Lee Goff, 43, of Hilo was a professional steel worker in Connecticut before an on-the-job accident.
“I built skyscrapers. I worked with cranes. I was the guy with the steel at the end of the crane,” he said.
He thinks he would still be a union steelworker if it wasn’t for a fall that broke both his legs, required reconstructive wrist surgery on both arms and bolts inserted in both sides of his jaw.
He reminisces about being on a crew that helped build the 23rd floor of the new One World Trade Center. But his eyes look distant, because that was years ago — before his injuries.
For a long time, he wasn’t able to eat solid food at all.
“My mother, she had a Cuisinart. She’d take a steak and grind it up and put gravy with it. I’d drink it through a straw,” Goff said, showing scars that document his survival and ongoing rehabilitation.
He has been on the street since October, and off-and-on during his decade of living on the Big Island. He came here to see an uncle but is not able to live there.
He’s recently been staying at a temporary shelter for men operated by HOPE Services at a Hilo church.
The construction fall continues to affect his ability to function on a daily basis, including his ability to eat food. Meat must be extremely tender if he’s to try eating it.
Stereotypes can paint homeless people as drug addicts or alcohol abusers, and some are. But Goff said he graduated from a West Hawaii dual diagnosis program called Po‘ailani Aloha in 2009 and has been clean and sober since.
Dual diagnosis includes substance abuse and another mental illness, such as bipolar disorder or schizoaffective disorder, both of which Goff has.
His street nickname among Hilo’s homeless is “Lee Boi” because, when he shaves, he said, he looks much younger than his four-plus decades.
Similar to many homeless people nationally, Goff is a survivor of traumatic brain injury.
He points to a now-healed wound in his forehead and says he was struck with a metal rod when he fought a man who was trying to steel his belongings. He said medical providers called it a “TBI” — a commonly used acronym for traumatic brain injury.
In the immediate aftermath of getting hit on the head, Goff said, he knocked the assailant over, picked up the same metal rod and wanted to hit the man.
But the rod was so heavy — even though the man had struck him with it — that Goff feared it would cause too much harm. So he dropped the rod and, with it, the confrontation.
Life on the street requires a man to be cautious, he said. To keep yourself safe, you’ve got to avoid trusting people. Sleep in places where lots of people don’t pass by, but someplace where enough people are around that someone can’t attack you unnoticed.
After a recent scuffle, Goff said, he suffered injuries, pointing to fresh scabs on his skull.
His medical needs often go untreated.
“I haven’t had glasses in over a year,” he said. He needs them to see long-distance properly.
But he’s still able to take part in his favorite leisure activity: reading. He enjoys books by authors such as Dean Koontz.
“I like to sit under a tree with the sun around me and read a book,” he said.
Sleeping outdoors makes his asthma rough. His lungs rattle with congestion, and he uses and inhaler and a nebulizer.
Normally, when he’s outside sleeping, “you wake up a couple times a night just to make sure nobody’s around, nobody’s going to walk up on ya.” But, where he is now, “it was nice. I was able to plug my nebulizer in and I laid back and my eyes …,” he said, trailing off, indicating he drifted off to sleep.
He imagines buying a welding machine so he could earn extra money. He could afford an apartment if it was reasonably priced.
It’s embarrassing to ask people for money to buy a sandwich at lunchtime, he said.
“It’s not easy,” he said. “You just have to humble yourself.”
It’s ironic that Goff must ask for food, since he says he’s a pretty good cook.
“My best dish is chicken dumplings,” he said.
“I always pray,” he said, repeating, “I always pray. Every morning. I say, ‘Our Fathers’ … every time I wake up, I try to say it, tell the Lord I forgive them so I can sleep well.”
Email Jeff Hansel at jhansel@hawaiitribune-herald.com.
