Kimberly Dark presents “Constructive Conflict: Make a Long-Term Difference vs. Feel Better Short-Term” on Jan. 18. Part of Ku‘ikahi Mediation Center’s “Communication & Collaboration” Training Series, the workshop is slated for 8:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. at the Hawaii Innovation Center located at 117 Keawe St. in Hilo.
“Sometimes it feels really satisfying to tell someone off,” Dark says. “Maybe it was hard to speak up at all, so it feels like a triumph to get it all out. Or how about unfriending someone on social media when they make a racist or sexist remark? It feels good to cut negativity from your life, right?”
In this workshop, learn the difference between conflict and abuse and how sometimes, in the name of “not taking abuse,” we fail to take responsibility for communicating clearly, nurturing long-term relationships and community cohesion, and participating in conflict.
Drawing on lessons from Sarah Schulman’s book “Conflict is Not Abuse,” this workshop offers activities and practical strategies to understand the difference between abuse, conflict and resistance; use communication skills to evolve meaning rather than just state your case; and understand how victim/perpetrator identities influence communication.
In addition, it teaches how to de-escalate small conflicts, understand how “supremacy ideology” influences us all and stands in the way of conflict resolution and create a world where everyone (not just “victims”) are eligible for compassion.
Dark consulted in conflict resolution and facilitation for more than 20 years. She completed her mediator certification with the National Conflict Resolution Center, served on the Advisory Board of San Diego Mediation Center and served as principal for Current Change Consulting, which specialized in community facilitation, training and group conflict resolution. A sociologist, she currently writes, teaches and performs worldwide.
Tuition for the workshop is $50 (group discounts and individual needs-based partial scholarships available).
To register, visit https://makealong-termdifference.eventbrite.com or contact Al-Qawi Majidah Lebarre at Ku‘ikahi Mediation Center by calling 935-7844, ext. 3, or via email at majidah@hawaiimediation.org.
