The darkness of Alzheimer’s
For years, I have seen how Alzheimer’s disease has slowly but steadily stolen the souls of the people afflicted with it.
When darkness descends on a bright sunny day from a solar eclipse, so does the darkness of Alzheimer’s, but unlike an eclipse, the sunny day never returns.
The disease steals the individual’s soul, and it also steals from their family the person they knew and loved. It leaves a memory of the individual that is altered and forever skewed. You may remember them before the disease took over, but these last memories are lasting memories.
No matter how many times you hear, “That’s not the person you remember, it’s the disease, it has changed them, it’s not their fault,” their new image keeps coming at you steadily — in your mind, in your dreams, whenever their name is mentioned. You struggle to remember the way they were, but their new image is always there.
And then there is the guilt of when you can no longer deal with them. They become an overwhelming burden on you and your loved ones — the disruptions, the financial costs, the everyday, without let up, the trauma becomes more than you can handle.
There also is the guilt of having them in a facility, and your sense of relief: I shouldn’t feel this way, but I do. Am I a bad person?
No, you are a human being that has taken this as far as you can, and now it is up to others to help you. There should be no shame, just appreciation that there is a system out there to help you.
My sympathy and heart go out to those families dealing with this disease and the friends of those who don’t have families that take it on upon themselves to deal with this disease.
I also feel deeply for the patient. Guided by a broken mind, they can no longer think for themselves. There is only fear and suspicion that controls them, and it is all very real to them. The terror must be unbearable.
Support and thank those that deal with Alzheimer’s on the front lines. Support the families and friends of the victims of this disease, and support those politicians who deal with this disease.
They all need your help.
Roger Schweitzer
Volcano